“It’s hard to be in the world... when you lose pride“
(Mahmood – Money)
November is perhaps the month of the year that I prefer, however, for two weeks my body has been sending me signs of malaise characterized by headaches, dizziness, nausea and some other injuries.
What to do when we feel unwell and cannot help ourselves? I went to the family doctor who, however pleasant, as much as he reassures me and manages to make me feel comfortable in an environment where I am certainly never, not He managed to be of great help to me. In the following days I continued to feel unwell!
This week I would have, exceptionally, two dinners at the restaurant with a company I didn't want to lose. Energetically I wanted to get out of my shell and my salitude so, I had accepted but, the closer I got and the more I continued not to feel well!
Yesterday, around lunchtime, I called a chiropractic office, a point of reference for my mom and, I made an appointment for the afternoon. In the past few days, the family doctor felt the possibility of having tensions and contractions in the neck and back area and, thinking about it, I had and I have also a knee pain.
My car had been stationary for days, I also postponed twice the dental hygiene that has now been rescheduled in mid-December. I never left the house again. Where am I going? What do I do? My world is my room and my space here... because outside I feel and live only discomfort and lack of freedom to express myself.
It's a complicated world, even if the web is!
Having arrived in the studio of chiropractica I found a welcoming and energetically particular environment starting from the reception and energy of the secretary. I was placed in a small room for a short wait and, to my surprise, after a while came a male voice that I did not expect.
So I met a gentle face and eyes that welcomed me a second time, they briefly questioned me and listened to me and then started the session: a journey to relaxation and awareness, I would say.
I find it hard to explain what happens when you lie on that bed. Tummy down, riding and then sitting. In some moments when you are belly down it seems to fly over a blanket of white clouds, read.
The minutes go by and it seems to feel that as you get a greater awareness of your body, of yourself. It seems to see a tent open gently in which there were some aspects that you did not care about and now they are there, talking to you.
There is not only you but there is also the good energy of the person who is treating you. Loneliness disappears and a certain desire is voiced to find a way, perhaps that of one's own place in the world.
After the session I returned home and in the evening I managed to face the exit to the restaurant. Tonight I should have the second appointment (at the restaurant) and in the new week that will come back to the practice studio. Let’s try to take a little care of ourselves if, I need to find even a shred of well-being.
During my brief chat with the chiropractic boy, the question of this company came up: what do you do or what do you do? My answer is that I have been unemployed for quite some time and the truth is that work, as well as the world outside my room, makes me feel enormously uncomfortable.
Here is the meaning of the phrase quoted at the beginning of my writing; without work, without employment it is difficult to understand the position in this world and pride may be a little lacking. For many work is equal to dignity, autonomy. For many it is the identification of an important part of one’s self, perhaps because it should be one’s own art and passion to express oneself while instead often it is not. Perhaps work should be the expression of something that makes us feel good and not bad as it is carved in my head.
Money, money, and more money in this company. There is thirst for money and power. Appearance... appearance that I felt yesterday. This world has distorted me a bit, I have let myself be turned around in relation to what is really important.
It is time to move some energy without fear because it must be something beautiful to be able to rediscover and find again. Beware that maybe we can change clothes because the ones we wear belong to an energetic past that is to be changed again like a wetsuit that needs to be left behind.
Humanity and energy (those good against evil), here is the path that can make me feel better!
