In the past few weeks I have spent several days when life and time have really weighed me down; I felt sick in both my soul and body.
It's been really hard days when you see yourself all around and struggle to find relief but don't find one.
You also lack the energy to talk to a friend or soul that isn’t there at the time, just because you’re sick and everything creates you a kind of black vision and feeling.
Evil advances, what I see and perceive in those situations where violence is used instead of self - control, respect and kindness.
Life is a story and a complex experience, but, now that I have had a few days of truce, I have the impression of feeling a new burden on my shoulders.
I listen to him, I observe him and I try to understand how he arrived and how he will come again.
A often problematic context is the family, especially if at almost 39 years of age you still live under the same roof.
On the one hand, it is fortunate because there are those who would like this fortune but have lost it; on the other, there is the need to create our own family in harmony and in line with what we are.
Under the concept of family you can space a lot: there are different types and types of families, including also those made up of friends from whom we surround ourselves.
What would life be if there were no "friends" outside the environment in which we grow?
As much as we can strive to be solitary beings, we are made to socialize; sometimes this is the source of wellbeing or malaise if something does not work.
The years pass and I see the times become harder and harder, not only for the normal course of time but also for the difficulties of the modern historical period, which almost seems to make us live less and less.
Why these thoughts, why this diary page?
My inspiration came from troubles, recently perceived weights and from reminding me that, in being sick, I no longer knew why I was sick and what could make me feel good.
When I'm sick I wonder what would make me feel better; I think it is important to ask, because it can be the first step towards an important direction: to take care of us constructively.
Why am I okay?
Why am I sick?
What can I do to get better or what could make me feel better?
In the moment of darkness it remains difficult to answer these questions because the head is full and confused, as wrapped in an annoying fog.
They make us sick bits of our history but also the contexts around us.
Similarly, what we know makes us feel good, that is, when we have already found it and it is part of our lives.
In order to say what makes us feel good, we must have experienced it at least once.
Sometimes it might be that I feel bad because I'm out of my context, I find myself in a world that's not mys, a dimension built with tunes on who I really am and that matters to me.
